


Who I Am Today

by Ginsteer



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-04-06
Packaged: 2019-04-19 04:06:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14228868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ginsteer/pseuds/Ginsteer
Summary: Danny comes to terms with a few things after thinking about his past with Brooke.





	Who I Am Today

**Author's Note:**

> I had to add my two cents to episode 8.18 as well. Thanks to imaginary_iby for beta'ing this *sends hugs and kisses*

Danny carefully unbuckled Charlie from his car seat and picked the sleeping child up. He grunted a bit under the added weight as he moved his son to his left side. Charlie mumbled something under his breath and instinctively tightened his thin arms around his father’s throat, face buried in his neck. Danny muttered soothingly into Charlie’s ear and kissed the side of his blond head, trying to keep him from waking up. It was late already. Too late for a young child to still be up and about. Danny had been grateful when he had glanced in the rear mirror and saw that Charlie had nodded off.

Holding his son in one arm, Danny reached for the overnight bag Rachel had packed. It took a bit of grunting and shifting to snatch the handle of the bag, but he managed. With his hip, he closed the car door and wearily walked up the narrow path to Steve’s house. The light in the living room was off, but Danny saw the color-changing flicker of the TV through he windows.

When he reached the front door, Danny awkwardly bent his knees and pushed the door handle down with his elbow. Charlie whined at the unexpected jostle and Danny shushed him again.

The door slowly swung open and Danny stepped inside. Thankfully, the TV’s volume was on low and the noise didn’t disturb Charlie’s fragile slumber.

Steve, who was sprawled on the couch, turned his head. Danny saw his partner’s eyes move first to him, then to Charlie’s sleeping and form and then back to him. “Hey,” Steve whispered eventually, smiling softly. “You’re back.”

The sight of Steve felt like balm on Danny’s stressed soul. He hadn’t really realized it before, but what he was feeling wasn’t just plain exhaustion. It was more than that. He felt restless, on edge. His emotions were all over the place and there was an inner tumult going on that made him want to hit something and collapse both at the same time. But seeing Steve after such a harrowing day of revisiting his past— it felt good. It felt _right_. He smiled tiredly.

“I’m gonna put Charlie to bed. I’ll be right back,” Danny whispered while toeing off his shoes. He carried his sleeping son to the downstairs bedroom and gently lay him down on the large bed. Fortunately, Rachel had already put him in a pair of pajamas. All that was left to do now was pull the covers back and tuck the boy in. Danny kissed Charlie’s forehead and quietly slipped out of the room, the door left ajar.

As he walked back in the living room, Danny felt another wave of fatigue wash over him. It wasn’t the same kind of exhaustion he typically felt after a long day at work. Usually, the tiredness sat in weary muscles and aching joints. Today, it lay deeper; less physical and more emotional.

“There’s leftover chicken salad in the refrigerator and fresh bread on the counter,” Steve let him know when he shuffled over to the couch.

Danny plopped down next to his partner on the couch, shoulders and thighs touching, and instantly soaked up Steve’s familiar warmth. His head dropped to the back of the couch and his eyes closed on their own accord. “Thanks, but I’m not hungry.”

Steve hummed quietly, but didn’t respond to it.

They both stayed silent for a couple of minutes and Danny drifted somewhere between sleep and awareness. The low noise of the TV was a welcoming background noise. It drowned out the whispering voices and whirling thoughts in his head.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

Danny sighed and peeled his heavy eyelids back open. He rolled his head toward his partner. The light of the TV was casting Steve’s features in a bluish light and emphasized his high cheekbones and sharp jawline. His eyes seemed even bluer than normal.

“Danny?” Steve nudged him softly, pulling him out of his drifting thoughts. Danny cleared his throat. He was about to answer when he noticed the icepack Steve was holding to his right forearm.

“What happened to your arm?” he asked, nodding wearily to the arm that lay across his partner’s stomach.

Steve shrugged and removes the icepack. “It’s nothing,” he replied, revealing a purpling bruise that spreads from his wrist to almost his elbow. “A suspect tried to run and I stopped her.”

Danny huffed out an airy chuckle. “ _Her_? You got into a fight with a woman?”

“Not a fight,” Steve replied. “I _stopped_ her,” he corrected and pointed at his bruise. “This is from _stopping_ her.”

“Ah,” Danny nodded with a tired chuckle.

“You’re avoiding my question,” Steve reminded him, voice sounding soft and tender again. He tossed the soggy icepack onto the table and moved his hand to Danny’s leg. “Are you okay?”

Danny considered the question for a few long seconds. All those years ago, as a rookie cop in New Jersey, he’d been young and naïve. He’d felt like he could take on the world by himself. He’d done things he probably shouldn’t have done and made decision that had come from his heart, not his head. But did he regret any of it? If he could go back and change things; would he?

No. Without those mistakes, without the lessons he’d learned in the process, he wouldn’t be where he was today. He wouldn’t have Grace and Charlie, he wouldn’t have the most amazing group of friends and he wouldn’t have Steve.

They both came with their own heavy baggage. But it didn’t matter. What _did_ matter was that they were there for each other. Always. And as long as he kept seeing those mesmerizing blue eyes whenever he felt lost or overwhelmed, then everything he’d gone through was worth it. Mistakes formed you into the person you were.

Some of the weight fell off Danny’s chest as he came to terms with his past. He smiled softly and reached for Steve’s hand. “I’m good,” he responded as he wrapped his fingers around his partner’s wrist. He felt the slow and steady beat of Steve’s heart against his fingertips. “You know, when you came into my life seven years ago you turned everything upside-down. You made everything more complicated, more dangerous and more frustrating. But, despite all of that, you made things _better_. You came into my life at just the right time.”

Steve swallowed. “So did you,” he whispered. He pulled Danny into a tight embrace.

Danny melted into Steve’s body and wrapped his arms around his partner’s waist. He inhaled Steve’s unique scent, which made him feel at home wherever he was. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Steve breathed and tightened his hold.

Danny closed his eyes. Things were okay. And if they weren’t, then they were going to be.

 

**End**


End file.
